There’s this joke that old-time musicians used to like to tell, but maybe now it’s only popular amongst us fiddlers: Q: How do you get a banjo player off your porch? A: You pay for your pizza. It’s just a bit of good-natured humor, but I don’t think...
I am the one that the world left behind—at least until you finish reading this. It wasn’t that I was unremarkable. Everyone has something about them that is uniquely their own. It just so happened that my thing was floating through foster families, schools, and social...
I stay up later than most people, so I was still awake and playing computer games when the crash happened. Tires screeched before I heard a tremendous crunching of metal. I thought it was just a simple car accident outside until an emerald spray of...
I was skeptical when my online friends first linked me to the supposed “evil Kickstarter” that was going viral on the less-than-wholesome forums we frequented. We were an unmoderated haven for trolls, weirdos, and radicals, sure, but this Kickstarter was something else entirely. It seemed...
I drink, not because I like alcohol, but because I’ve recently seen the horrifying underbelly of the world, and I can’t go back to blissful ignorance in any other way than through the bottom of a bottle. I can’t sleep, either, so I’m writing this...
PART ONE I guess I’ll start with an introduction? My name is Brendon Spirit. Ac...
Woodard Hall was empty. All the university workers were gone for the day, but it didn’t matter whether the building was occupied or not; it always felt empty. The long corridors sprinkled with muted orange lights drained all the energy out of the building, like...
Mr. Vanhin had a wonderful day. He woke up at 5 am, said his morning prayers, and cooked himself a full breakfast, complete with fried eggs, sausages, and bacon. At 10 am, after a short nap in his favorite armchair, he grabbed his cane, put...
I hate Friday nights. Lately, I just hate them. I rolled a six this time, so I can breathe easily for another week. I turn away from the poor suckers still rolling the dice. I can't watch. The only sound in the room is the small crack...
“Sorry, new kid, but you’re last in today so you’re our candidate this year!” The kid in front of our classroom door relaying this to me looked a mixture of pity and relief, his nose taped over and a black eye, an immediate standout feature....
Our story begins, as so many do, with the approach of an oncoming storm. In the port city of Trondheim, Norway, a city regarded as the nation’s capital of knowledge, a young married couple are sitting in their living room, watching television. Their love and...
Grandpa Cobalt hated letting things go. Whether it was the wobbly chair he kept in his study or his favorite warped record he fed to the gramophone—looping the same groove over and over. He was a tall man with a frosty thin hairline and a nose capable...
I think most people are surprised when they learn one of my hobbies is taxidermy. I know what you probably expect when you hear that – some shady-looking Ed Gein kind of guy. I’m going to clear this up off the bat. Not everyone that practices...
A few seconds. I looked down for just a few seconds, and I ended up being treated to an experience that has permanently warped my sense of reality. I was driving home after work. I’d had to stay late to help clean up, and the sun...
“My wife is such a bitch.” Right on schedule, Shane started complaining about his wife while drinking beer number four. Whether it has anything to do with the amount of alcohol in his system or whether he thought enough time had passed so he could start...
Found this journal in an old storage locker I had taken possession of. It’s dated in the summer of 1985, and the pages are curled, smelling faintly of popcorn. As for the contents…well, go ahead and start reading. June 1 Infiltrating Funtasia’s Dreamscape Circus was easier than...
How does it feel? It asks this as it cuts deep into the inner thigh, flesh and fat zippering apart, its tongue probing into the fresh wound. How are you doing? The thing wouldn't want an answer even if there was one. It only wants screams. This is going...
Pirarucu. The Brazilian name for “the red fish,” known among scientific circles as the arapaima. If you’ve never heard of “the red fish” before now, then prepare yourself, because you won’t be forgetting it anytime soon. Imagine a living torpedo, pushing ten feet and five hundred pounds...
Katie Watson gazed around at the vast, opulent room. For the first time in her professional career, she felt small and vulnerable. The world had changed in the last several years, but the building they were in had remained unaltered since its construction over a...
Ford Street Bridge - Minneapolis, Minnesota Wednesday, September 10, 2021 - 11:55 p.m. EST Willis, hurry your ass up! Can’t you hear all those popping off like Fourth of July fireworks, and the sky’s a funky-ass green. Ronny told us all to leave over two hours...
